Inside Kimmy’s Mind

Woo hoo! I have already posted 100 entries on my blog. This will be the 101 entry. I can’t believe I have that many entires. But for some reason it feels like I should have more. -_-

So Thanksgiving is this week. I am so ready for pumpkin pie. :9 Pumpkin pie makes me think of my friend Andrea. She was in my cce class during senior year. And one Wednesday we talked about craving pumpkin pie and popcorn. >_< Odd combination now that I think about it. If I remember correctly it was after any holiday that would require a pumpkin pie present. We were just reminiscing  aww but I miss her. After I deleted my myspace, I lost track with her.

Wow I just got my Future me email today. I think its funny because I remember typing it out and how I felt during that time. It was in April so it wasn’t too long ago. But still I have already changed so much since then.

Dear FutureMe,

Right now you are feeling horrible. And you always thought that once you were single things wouldn’t change; apart from being single and not having that person to talk to. Pretty soon the semester will be over, and you won’t have to deal with having this person in a class anymore. Just pull through, things will end up ok. Just have a Happy Thanks Giving. Don’t gain too much weight. Ok? I hope you passed math during the spring 2009 semester.

The only thing that didn’t happen is me passing that stupid math class. I hope I do that this time around. This time is a time I’d rather not remember because it was just so annoying. I mean now I’m fine. A-OK. Right as rain. (I don’t get this saying.) But anyway, the whole shitty line,” Only time will heal.” That we all can’t stand hearing/repeating. But its true. Time does heal. You hurt. You move on. Until one day it no longer hurts. Like I’ve said before having a fast forward button would be great. But then you miss out on things that happened in between then and now. Which wasn’t too much apart from having a new crush. I wish I could have prevented my cell from breaking. Karma for wanting a new cell. -_- pffft I’ve been thinking a lot about karma because of the book I’m reading. Shadowland by Alyson No

I was bored earlier so I put on makeup (which is something I don’t ever do) and took pictures. I was going for the vintage look. Again for like the 400th time I’m obsessed with the Polaroid program. I’ve been making pictures into polaroids like crazy. Here are a few.

I couldn’t resist turning them into polaroids. >_<

I also wore some high heels. And I’m talking high. I am used to wearing flats for everything. And I intend to keep it like that.

I’m going to try to make a vlog tomorrow. If I get up early enough. But I wouldn’t count on it. Seeing as it is 4:20 in the morning. >_< My screwed up sleep patterns. Ok there are only a few more days of November. I should try to put in another entry before the month is over. I didn’t update a lot this month. ~_~ I hope I find some motivation to finish my web design homework before Tuesday.

The song I can’t get out of my head thanks to Mija. I believe in a thing called love by The Darkness.

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My cell finally kicked the can. Actually there was no kicking involved, just the loud yelling of profanity.

It happened so fast. My whole world flashed before my eyes as the screen went blank. Ok I’m being over dramatic here but I can’t believe my cell is dead. I feel so awkward without it. And to top it all off right before it broke I had just gotten a text message from my crush but I wasn’t able to reply to it. How unfair is that? I mean it just had to break at that particular moment. Is this karma? Am I being punished for wanted a new cell phone? T-T Which I can’t get until January. I can’t wait month to get a new cell. I am the most impatient person ever. I hate waiting a day let alone a month. So until that glorious day in January I am going to have to use an my dads old cell phone. I have to transfer my numbers and stuff to the old phone tomorrow. I hope I can do that even with the phone broken. I swear if I can’t do that I’m seriously going to go crazy. I know it shouldn’t be causing such a serious uproar. But I cannot not have my cell. This only further proves that technology controls my soul and behavior. It makes me go crazy if I don’t have it. This isn’t the first time that technology has turned its back on me. I freaked when my laptop broke. But there was a time way before that. Now journey back with me to a time (now I don’t remember the year so bear with me if you will) where the once popular Giga Pet was still popular. You know the virtual pet in the palm of your hands. I had finally gotten a Giga Pet to call my own x amount of Christmas’s ago. It was a cat, yellow and triangular just like the one in the link I provided above. I immediately opened it and named my cat ready to embark on the journey to owning a cat. Well sort of. I played with it and not long after setting it up I dropped it and it broke. No more kitty. I being a child at the time cried. Every time something bad happens I always think of the time right before the horrible thing takes place. Thinking I could have prevented it. (Yes I am mourning my broken cell. I have serious problems) Anyway so I was deeply sad and crushed about it. My mom being the hero she is, took back my broken virtual pet and returned with a new one. Wow this story just makes me seem like a brat. Not exactly what I was going for. >_< My point is that at a young age technology has had its cold grasp of doom on my soul. I still have that Giga Pet and if I were to buy batteries for it, it would work. How can a Giga Pet last for years and my fucking cell didn’t last two years? Stupid LG: No life isn’t good. I didn’t realize the effect of having a cell phone. Because one you get used to something there is no going back. >_<

In other news. I am thinking of leaving Youtube and switching to Vimeo. Now I didn’t start vlogging or blogging for an audience. I am simply doing it because its fun. It includes two things I find very fulfilling. Writing and video editing. But the Youtube community is mean and cold. I only have 32 subscribers on Youtube so its not like I get a ton of views. But every now and then I will get a mean comment from some horrible person.

The recent one said,”Your sad not because you like Kidrobot but because we dont care.”

Now do not get me started on the proper use of Your and You’re. I know I have slipped now and then. But I try to fix that mistake as soon as possible. I deleted this comment because well it annoyed the hell out of me. And another thing who is the we they are referring to? We as in the world? Because how does he know others don’t care? I know there are 32 people in the world that care enough to subscribe to my videos. So that right there proves them wrong. Anyway, so I’m getting tired of Youtube. I think Vimeo will be more accepting to my vlogs. My next vlog will be uploaded to Vimeo and I will see out it goes. Now I’m debating on deleting my Youtube account. I think I will keep it because I still have people that I’m subscribed to and I enjoy their videos. Plus I have quite a few vlogs on my account. And quite frankly I’m way too lazy to switch all of those videos over to Vimeo. Plus this give me a chance to try a new more exciting vlogging style. I should have more fun with my vlgos. I think I’m more witty in my blogs than my vlogs. I should make them less boring. (see I’m not in denial)

I have a test tomorrow..today so I should go to sleep. I hope I pass it. I’m still upset about my cell phone. T-T I don’t think time will heal this wound…only a new cell phone will. ;P

I got a tumblr blog. Which is unnecessary. I am aware of that, but for some odd reason I got one. I just tried to add a small entry. And failed miserably.

I can’t really make small entries, (I consider this entry a small entry) because one thing makes me go off on another ect. This causes me to continue typing out more words then I originally planned on. So maybe tumblr isn’t something I should have signed up for. Maybe if it had a layout that was more me I would warm up to it. Plus I need to come up with a much more fitting url name than comingupblank. If you can’t guess I was coming up blank when thinking for names. >_< Where did my creativity go? I need to finish my painting but I have no idea what to paint.

That was at 3:46 early today. It is now 10:18, and I now have an idea of what I want to paint. Well sort of. Its only an idea so it could either disappear or not work out. But hey, I should be optimistic about this correct? So I’m hoping my creative abilities show themselves and work for me tonight. Because it would suck if they decided to just up and leave me. I mean I just got a $225 scholarship for art. So I have to show him what I’m made of, or else he’ll think he made the wrong decision in giving me this money. And its money that I can use for anything. It doesn’t have to be for school. Of course I’ll use it for school. Or maybe Christmas presents for the family. I never have money, let alone a lot of it. And yes $225 is a lot of money to me. Some with a steady income might think otherwise. >_< I need a job that is steady. I mean I like being lazy and have my weekends free. But lets face it, I need money still. And I need to open a savings account. I plan to next week to put that $225 in a safe place. Maybe mom will let me use it to buy a new cell phone. Which sounds very conceited and spoiled of me. I know. -_-

Now it is already Saturday. Damn I put off posting this entry. Its now 4:37 a.m. I didn’t really paint much between then and now. I just gessoed over an inappropriate blue penis, that a classmate of mine decided to paint on my canvas. Of course it was after I said that I was going to paint over what I already had. I know that if I hadn’t mentioned that I was starting over, he wouldn’t have drawn on my canvas. Well I’m almost sure he wouldn’t have. Anyway, I am going to be forced to wake up in a couple of hours soon to get ready to go Houston. My sister wants to go to the Art Institute open house. She is thinking of majoring in Culinary. And so she wants to ask a few questions. She is a junior in high school and she is freaking out about college. Of course I tell her everything will work itself out. I’m not exactly sure what I’m doing. I just know that it involves writing. I’m hoping to get into publishing if that is possible. But all I have to do is try right? Of course I’m horrible at editing writing. I know I have tons of typos and grammar errors in every single one of my blog entries. But I’m usually too lazy to look over them until after I have posted them. Gosh I’m lazy. -_- Ok well I plan to record tomorrow since it will be all five( meaning the whole family) of us together for more than a few moments. Kat and I usually hide in our rooms, while mom watches her dramas in the living room. And dad is either outside or in his “office” aka the garage. Mija (when she is home) is either in my room or in the living room (depending where she left her lappy plugged in) with mom.

See what did I tell you? I started with one topic to only end with a completely different one. Yup.

So I went to Oni-con this past weekend. And got to see the Jrock band Born, and the solo artist Satsuki. Their performances were the only ones I was awake for. The two other opening acts were really unnecessary.

Which sucks because Tomo from echostream is adorable and an excellent guitarist. He should be in a band with other hot talented Japanese men. Not weird Americans minus the female singer. I think she is Japanese. Anyway, I didn’t like their songs at all. So I sat to the side of the mob of people and slept. Yes slept. How does one sleep during a concert? Well since you asked. For me it was quite easy. These concerts don’t always have a lot of people. So it wasn’t like the whole room was packed. Like I said I sat off to the side and just put my hood over my head a fell asleep during the boring performances. Simple. But I was immediately awoken by Born’s performance. They scream a lot. But I didn’t rejoin the mob. I’m one of those lazy people at concerts. I don’t always get into the head banging. Normally I stay in the crowd for a while. But since I stayed up making the Halloween bags for the band I wasn’t in the moshing mood. Nor was I in the mood to be drenched in the singers spit. He would occasionally take gulps of water and spray the audience. He also occasionally touched himself or would slide the mic down his throat for an awkward dirty reference. What would a Jrock concert be without fanservice? The singer would kiss his band mates which I find hilarious. This is the first band I’ve seen live that did that much fanservice. Phantasmagoria didn’t really do that, 12012 not so much, Sugar and Dio I don’t remember either of them partaking in fanservice. But anyway it was really fun. I was tired as hell but I still had fun.

I got a Cure Magazine which Born signed and a cute Panda bento. I love bento boxes they are so cute. This is my second one. It was one of the cheaper ones yet still expensive. In Japan this bento would cost like 10 bucks. But here in America it is 20. >_< Not fair. Kat got one as well except hers is a pig. I found a frog and bear one online. So I might buy them the next time I get money. Whenever that is…anyway I only went Friday for the concert and Saturday for the Q&A and photo/autograph sessions. Since they did that all on one day I just slept in on Sunday. The hotel they had it at this year was too small. They should have it at the George Brown Convention Center again, because although they were unorganized with it you had room to move around and breathe. And another thing I hate about conventions is that older people should dress in proper attire. Like cover up. I mean really did some of these women feel comfortable wearing nothing? I mean even chicks that have the bodies to wear nothing wore more clothing than this certain lady. I turn the corner and hello cellulite. I mean I don’t mean to be rude. But for the love of chocolate cover up. I mean dress your age. And underwear is not an outfit. Nor can it be used when cosplaying as a character. It should be worn under clothing, or over if you wish. But never by itself. GAHhhh The memory is reburning my retinas. >_< So aside for the venue being too small, and old people not covering up and people getting in my way, it went well. The lines weren’t as bad as they were for Phantasmagoria. So thats was cool. And I got to meet interesting Japanese artists and get their autographs.

So that pretty much sums up my weekend. I am now being slapped by reality now. But on the plus side I made a 92 on my Web Design test that I didn’t really study for. All I did was skim through the power points before my class. I do not suggest you to make this a permanent study habit…or in my case having no study habit at all. On the minus side, I haven’t finished my Web Design assignments so I need to finish those asap. Another minus, because there is always more minuses than pluses. MY CELL PHONE IS BREAKING. I didn’t even drop it. Both my mom and sister’s cell have the same problem. But theirs is due to dropping their cell with great force. And theirs are in worse condition than my own. But its not a coincidence that they are all cracked in the same spot. How is that even possible? Anyway, I have to wait til January until I can get a new cell. And I am one of the world’s most impatient inhabitants. So waiting is like excruciating pain to me. Ok so I’m exaggerating I know its not that long until January. But still. So it doesn’t really cause me physical pain. But it does cause me emotional pain. My cell is an extension of me, and I have become the type of person that communicates via text messaging all the time. I never thought I was that type of person (theres absolutely nothing wrong with cell people) I just never thought I would have to have my cell with me every time I left the house in order to function right. And thats exactly how it is for me. So I can still use my cell right now, but its cracked and pretty soon its death is likely to happen sooner rather than later. Before you know it the screen will no longer be attached to the number pad. I doubt it will still work after that happens. So I must be careful with my dying cell phone. T-T I hope it can last until January. I can’t wait until I get a new cell. Its time for a new one. Minus number 3 I believe? I have no idea what to paint for art. It can be anything. And I am having trouble? Sucks. Must think creatively and artistically. Hopefully I can dreamstorm (Garrett’s term) tonight.

Ok night world. I need motivation!