Inside Kimmy's Mind

I registered for the upcoming fall semester. Great, back to worrying about homework and tests and waking up for class on time. Productiveness.

Ok maybe I’m a tad bit happy about going back to school. Maybe? I mean don’t get me wrong I love sleeping late and just being lazy and not having to worry about anything. But even that can be a tad bit boring. I wish I had a job over the summer. But that didn’t happen. But once school starts again all of the annoying High School students will quit their jobs and then establishments will have no choice but to hire people like me. Why does that sound like a put down? >_< Anyway, my classes this semester are as follows: … continue reading this entry.

I was talking to my friend Dustin, the other day. We were making plans to hang out again on Friday. And we got on the subject of memories again. And It made me think. As we get older we forget the little details of things. But I think sometimes the memories we forget are brought back by a picture or video or a scent all by accident. Something that jogs our memory to that time and place. But why?

That got me thinking about the memories we do remember. Why do we remember them? Like my senior English teacher said, “Repetition and trauma.” Is how you remember something. But I think if its good or if its something that made you happy, you would remember it as well. But lets face it trauma/embarrassing moments trumps happiness. And you are not quick to forget the horrible things in life. Sigh. Anyway talking with Dustin made me think of how I was as a kid. I mean I know I am different from then. I know a ton of things now that I didn’t even knew existed as a child. (simpler times) But as we get older how does the brain file away memories? I mean do we remember everything and our brains just decide which details to share with us and which ones we forget? I stop to think and I only remember a bit of my time with Dustin. Like I remember a few things but not a lot. And he was one of my best friends in Elementary. Of course when I moved away we grew apart. But still that was a big chunk of my childhood. Of course I still don’t remember the first time I was introduced to him. That’s sad. But hey we were five, and you can’t blame me for not remembering something that happened what 14 years ago?

But then I have memories of days in Preschool (before then)where sometimes nothing exciting or happy happened to me. It was just an ordinary day like any other. Why do I remember days like that? One for example is when we traced our profile using our shadow. I mean I remember sitting in the chair by the door in the dark while the teacher shined the light to cast a shadow of my profile which was traced by another teacher. Why do I remember that? Then of course I remember when BJ (boy I liked) would give me rings from those gum ball machines and I would then lose them in the playground. But he would keep giving me them always saying,” Don’t take it to the playground and lose it.” Which I would always say,”I won’t lose it. I promise.” And of course it would result in me losing it. -_- Yup I never did learn my lesson. But I mean why would I remember these things? Another preschool memory is of the hallway outside my classroom and we are sitting on benches to go to the bathroom. And I just remember sitting on those benches. Nothing big happened or traumatic, so why that memory? What separates it from things I don’t remember? Why are these memories special compared to others?

Anyway Missy’s Bridal Shower is next week. I already have Five games I believe? One involves love songs. Which I asked people on my facebook and twitter to give me suggestions, but do they? No. Whats the point in having a facebook if the friends on it won’t even give feedback? Stupid facebook. Its fine I don’t really talk to everyone on it so I guess it doesn’t matter. -_- My An Cafe cd is still stuck. T-T Mom will take it to the dealership on Friday and hopefully they can get it out. Here’s hoping.

I think of the oddest things.

Last Thursday my mom and sisters and I saw Phantom of the Opera on stage. It was amazing. I have seen a couple of operas, and Rent on stage but this was so much more…there are really no words to describe it. It was so fast paced and there were so many things to look at and notice. I loved every second of it.

I love Andrew Lloyd Webber’s musicals, my favorite might be Starlight Express…no maybe Cats. Who am I kidding I can’t just choose one. I like a lot of them. But Phantom of the Opera is the first one I have seen on stage. I have only seen the others on dvd and memorize the songs by heart. Sigh. Seeing this on stage was just wonderful. It was so beautiful I think my favorite part was during the Masquerade. Its so pretty. I definitely think if you aren’t sure about musicals this one would change your mind about them. So Sunday, we saw Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. I only read to the fourth book of the series so I couldn’t compare the last three movies with the books. Even though I enjoy doing that. But anyway with this movie I can’t say that it was good. I don’t know it just didn’t fit with the rest of the movies to me. But I’m not a big Harry Potter fan so I can’t really say anything about it. Oh and Mija and Kat and I made a dailybooth for our monsters. Because we are the biggest nerds in the world. But oh well. I think we might actually keep this one actually daily compared to our personal accounts.

The one time I play a cd in the car it gets stuck. T-T Why?! This happening made me in such a bad mood that I took it out on my mom. Which caused us to get into an argument, which resulted in me talking back and saying something I shouldn’t. When I get mad I blame it on others, especially when its most likely my fault to begin with. A habit I should immediately fix. So the first thing I should do when I wake up, is apologies. I mean I sort of did, but it was no where near enough. Sigh. I hate being angry and frustrated. STUPID ANGER FOR MAKING ME SPEAK BEFORE THINKING! >_<

This was the first time that I have seen a Jrock cd from a band that I actually like there. So Mija bought it for me. And then on the way home I from her apartment on Monday I wanted to listen to the cd, because I didn’t put the songs on my Ipod yet. And after the last song finished I pushed eject only to hear this horrible clicking sound instead of receiving my cd. T-T I’m so sad. I tried everything I could think of get it out, but no luck. Now I did rip it so its not like I don’t have the songs, but thats not the point. I still want the cd to be in its case and be in working condition. Like I said in a previous post I forgot how much I like buying cds. But this one is a Jrock cd so its 100 times more important. Plus Mija bought it for me. My only hope is that if mom takes it to the card dealer ship they can remove it with absolutely no damage to the cd. AAHHHHH! If Only I just put the songs on my Ipod then I this would never have happened. Pfffft >_<

The cd before its current predicament. Sigh.

I’m so annoyed right now that I can’t even update like normal. Pfffft Hopefully my next entry will be completely happy news to report.

Well first off, HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIJA! Congrats on turning 24, you old lady. I kid I kid. You know I love you. Duh I made Stein for you. Thats love. So I’m still waiting for Sims 3. Yup.

Anyway, has anyone seen this trailer for the new movie 500 Days of Summer? It looks so good. It comes out on the 17th I believe. I like overlapping pictures for some odd reason.  Zooey Deschanel And Joseph Gordon-Levitt are so adorable.  I’m excited and can’t wait to see this movie. I hope it has a happy ending.

Warning movie spoilers!!!!

I watched the movie Little Ashes starring Robert Pattinson and Javier Beltran. It was interesting. I’m not really sure how to describe it. As Dali, Pattinson was in many intimate scenes with Frederico aka Beltran. The characters never fully took their relationship to the stage of lovers. But they came close. Not really a disappointment with its boy on boy action. There was very limited nudity from either of the leading roles. You do see Pattinson’s pubes in two scenes but thats about it. lol And of course you see boobs, because it wouldn’t be a movie without some straight sex and nude chests. (That was sarcasm, if you couldn’t tell) Of course this movie is about Dali so it is very artistic, the romantic scene with Frederico and Dali in the ocean is shot very beautifully. Which is why while watching this movie (mainly this scene) I immediately wanted to paint something. I couldn’t resist. But all I drew was hands.

Sidetracked: To me I think that the clavicle bone is one of the most seductive bones of the human anatomy. Next to that are hands. I find hands to be equally as beautiful. No matter how they look. Hands have so many joints and muscles and parts to it that most of the time it doesn’t even occur to us how interesting hands are. Not to mention important. Then of course thinking about hands made me think about whether your right-handed or left. And then that made me think about the brain. And which side I use more. And thats basically how my brain works. I start off on one thing then end up on another entirely different topic. Sigh. So which side do you use?

Getting back to the movie, it course ends sad. Federico is kidnapped and then killed. And Dali is of course affected by his death. But remains Dali and continues on. I he died at the age of 84 in 1989. I find that so bizarre for some reason.

“Drawing is the honesty of the art. There is no possibility of cheating. It is either good or bad.” – Salvador Dali

You know that friend you had when you were a kid? In most cases its always a neighbor and a member of the opposite sex. Well for me it was anyway.

His name is Dustin. We used to play the oddest games as kids. I was weird. But according to my friend Hyun I still am. >_< Anyway, I have been talking to Dustin a lot recently, you know catching up and whatnot. The other day we met up for awhile just talking about our past and present. About why we sort of stopped talking to each other? REASON ONE: I moved to another neighborhood which defeated the carpooling purpose. lol REASON TWO: Junior high makes it complicated for boys and girls to be friends. Plus we no longer had recess so we couldn’t play Sailor Moon or Mortal Combat anymore. >_< Thats why the time before you are a teenager is much more easier. Because when you are kids it doesn’t matter if you are boy or a girl, you are just friends because its fun and you don’t know any better. jk. Now we are mature enough where it doesn’t matter again. And now that we are becoming adults we can say stuff like, “Lets do lunch.” Or , “yeah we should get together soon.” And actually mean it. Of course I’m a hermit (no license) so I don’t do anything really. But Dustin was kind enough to pick me up and we went to his house. It was so weird being back in my old neighborhood. I haven’t been there in so long. It was nice to hang out with him, since starting college I haven’t really made a lot of new friends. I mean of course I have Missy and Cate and Hyun. But when it comes to making new friends, thats just a skill I have yet to pick up. So if I can’t make new friends why not reunite with old friends? I was stupid and forgot to take pictures. T-T I’m getting old you know. But we will make plans again. ^ ^ Tuesday is Mija’s 24th birthday! (And I’m getting old?) jk So we are celebrating today because she will won’t be here. She stayed at work late the other day so currently she is past out on my bed. I decided to make her an Ipod monster for her birthday. So I had her design one. Then Kat and I stayed up til 5 in the morning making it for her. This one was tricky, but at the same time it has less flaws than the first two I made. Because I learned from my mistakes. >_< I made a few changes to it so it doesn’t look exactly like her drawing. But close enough to make her happy. This one opens at the head (to hold the ipod) , instead of as a pocket on the tummy. And it wasn’t big enough to add arms so I just left them off. And Kat made Mija a cake which we have yet to cut or sing Happy Birthday because the Oban-chan is sleeping. jk

I’m on a roll with making things (with my sewing machine), that look half decent. Again my sewing skills are as worse as my friend making skills. >_<

Ok I spent most of my time the other day making weird plushies. I was inspired by Stupid Creatures and decided to make my own. My sewing skills are in need of desperate improvement but that’s what practice is for correct? >_<

Anyway, I had Kat design her monster and she picked out the fabric and she helped ironed and cut out limbs and she sewed things on by herself. I was surprised to tell you the truth. I thought her involvement with this project would stop at drawing out her monster. But nope she helped with the long process. It took forever. Like I said before I still suck at sewing. Even with my machine I am horrible at it. Sometimes my foot cramps up and I can no longer control the speed. So what happens is I go too fast and the thread gets caught and messes up. I see that as my sewing machine’s way of telling me off. I know inanimate objects can’t talk. But if my sewing machine could it probably wouldn’t be saying nice things to me. Kat’s finished hers up by sewing on the tail and arms and I started cutting out a pattern for mine. But then dad came into the dining room eating his 5th brownie. He examined Kat’s monster and immediately said, “It should hold your ipod.” After saying that he left getting another brownie. Even though Kathy was already finished with her creature I told her that, that wasn’t a bad idea. So we decided to make the monsters hold our ipods. lol Even though we were already tired of threading needles.

Kat’s creature took forever because I wasn’t sure how to even make it. But we figured it out and “made it work”. (Project Runway fans?)But by the time we finished Kat’s for the second time I just wanted to hurry up and finish mine. I ran into a lot of different problems while working on mine. But thankfully Kathy was there to help me work through them. So the finish products are displayed in the pictures above. On Kat’s I used the zipper to double as a mouth while at the same time as an opening. So her monster consumes her ipod while mine sort of digests my ipod. It opens in the back. Mine was supposed to have arms but I was too tired to make them. And working with zippers aggravates me like nothing else. So I called it night/morning after sewing up my armless stupid creature/monster. So instead of stupid creatures, I’m calling ours Ugly (Ipod)Monsters. Clever I know. They aren’t the most impressive of things, but I’m proud of them. Because we ran into so many problems but solved them the best we could. Yay TEAM WORK! I’m lame I know. >_<

So how ’bout it Mija, did you think of a design for your monster? You know your ipod will be jealous that its not in the stomach of an ugly monster. And I already have two fabrics to use for yours and everything. Now nothing too complicated you hear me? Oh and I don’t have anymore zippers, so I’m going to have to either find a store that sells zippers or find a different way to open and close yours. Damn Walmart for getting rid of its fabric section! <3<3<3

You know that annoying feeling, when you want to do something but there is nothing to do? Yeah I believe it is called boredom? I hate being bored. And its not that I have nothing to do its that once I do something, I immediately want to do something else. Or if I finish a project too quickly then I’m left with that deep empty feeling of sadness.

I am attempting to make a vlog. Hopefully that goes well. Ok well I tried on my MOH (maid of honor) dress. I love it. I completed Missy’s orders and made it more Kimmy. And that means layering. >_< Again I am such a weirdo. I am thinking of buying some lace leggings and maybe some black flats. But I do like how the chucks look with the dress. It all depends on what the Bride wants. lol Speaking of the Bride. I am starting to write my speech. And I already know what I want to say to Missy. Its just hard to write and not cry. I hope when I have to say it, I will be able to enunciate and not just have tears streaming down my face. Damn sentimental words. I know they will get to me. Anyway, that’s something I’m working on.

I had the weirdest dream the other night. You know Build-a-Bear Workshop? That store where you pick out a teddy bear and dress it up and fill it up with “love” (aka heart shaped fabric cut outs) Well anyway, my sister Kathy when she was little she always wanted one. Heck I even wanted one at one point. I love stuffed animals. But I mean this store is ridiculously priced. The better the stuffed animal is the more money it costs. Anyway I had a dream that Kathy finally got the chance to make one. But her teddy bear was an S&M one. Could you imagine what that would look like? Hahahaha! I know I have problems. Either that or I have been hanging out with Mija way too much. What about a stripper bear? hahaha. WTF IS WRONG WITH ME? I am seriously disturbed.

I just finished making my vlog. Yup it took up most of the day. Damn see what a hassle it is to make a vlog? It takes too long now because my laptop does not like video files. But anyway I was just about to upload my vlog when Youtube decides to do its site maintenance. Bleh! How annoying! Well I will post it as soon as it lets me. So look forward to that. ^_^ The other day I watched Transformers- Rise of the Fallen with my mom and sisters. It was good. It had a lot of unnecessary scenes in it. But all in all it was a good watch. The first movie was better, but isn’t that always the case?

Friday I went with Missy and her mom to buy my maid of honor dress. Its pretty. I usually don’t like trying on clothes and wearing dresses and whatnot. But Missy knows all of that. She gave me the approval to make it Kimmy. How does she put up with me? I am such a weirdo I do not like v-cut anything. I like it cut straight. And I like having my arms covered. I am weird. But the dress is really pretty so thats something she doesn’t have to worry about anymore. She picked out her dress already too. Its gorgeous. A very pretty simple white dress. I know I’m going to be balling every few minutes during her actual wedding. Especially when she walks down the isle and says I do and when I hand her the ring. Oh and she is moving to El Paso. T_T I have been friends with her for so long. She has always been there for me. And I’m going to miss her so much. I can’t imagine my life with her not in it. MISSY I LOVE YOU!

We also went to El Chico’s for lunch and after that we went to Target and she bought her bridal shower invitations and wedding invitations. As the maid of honor I was asked to come up with shower games. I have only been to one Bridal shower in my entire life. So I have no idea what to do. Thank Bob for Google right Missy? Her shower will be August 1st and her Bachelorette party is on the 15th and then the big day is August 29th. Oh wow. I still can’t believe it. >_< My Missy is going to be someones wife. We usually joke how we are each others wives. Because we are fantastic and weird. I’m not quite sure when we started that but we did. Awww memories. *I’m not gonna cry. I’m not gonna cry.* Anyway, I need to start thinking of what sort of prizes there will be for her guest to win during the shower. Like bath salts, candles I guess? Again not sure. I’m totally excited for her and I could not be happier for her. I’m just skeptical about the guy that is taking away my wife. He is in the army so thats why they will be moving to El Paso. I haven’t met him yet but I’m sure after I do my skepticism will just disappear. ^^ Plus I have to scare the fuck out of him about what will happen to him if he hurts her. I kid you not. I may be a short Mexican girl, but the wrath of The Kimmy is not to be toyed with. lol Anyway so that was Friday.

The fourth of July was spent at my Uncle Sam’s house. lol (Yup I have an Uncle Sam hahaha) He has a fish fry every fourth at his house (sort of a ranch) along with crab and sometimes craw fish. I don’t like spicy foods. And they add a lot of spices to the crab, but it was good. I don’t like staying long at my uncle’s ranch long because its hot and I’m more of an indoor person. But this time I had cramps like you would not believe. It was horrible. So I wanted to leave even more than usual. And of course my dad will never understand. >_< But I did take pictures of the new German Shepard puppy they have now. And of the horses. Rhonda is their horse and they got a second horse named Starr (the one with the white spot on her forehead) because Rhonda just couldn’t get pregnant. They have had her for a while now and she is fully grown now. But for some odd reason Rhonda kicks at her and runs her off if you don’t pay attention to her. She is a meanie and pictured in the middle. But I kept petting her and didn’t take a proper picture of her. Starr kept her distance because she didn’t want to be kicked by Rhonda. The puppy was given a different name by my dad every few seconds but I think Betsy  after Betsy Ross finally stuck. Which is weird because my dad refers to his jeep as Betsy. That or Midnight. My dad gives everything more than one name. My other names are  flaca (meaning skinny in spanish), meaner…oh and I am also called by my sister’s names as well because each of our names begins with the letter K. So our parents get mixed up when calling for one of us.

Well I’m going to read my book and then catch some Z’s. I will post a picture of my moh dress soon.

“Searching for the time that has gone so fast- The time I thought would last.”- Paul McCartney

Usually I love finding things from my past. Like when I re read my old journals and relive each entry like it was yesterday. But in this case I’d rather not relive these memories. These memories that I have laid to rest in a box under my bed. Memories that I don’t want to necessarily forget, but just file under “Ignore for now” in my file cabinet of memories. Anyway, I found my old cell phone from my junior year and the beginning of my senior year in high school. And being the reminiscing chump that I am, I assumed it would be amazing memories. My junior year was amazing, I made friends with all the exchange students that year. Anyway I still have the charger so I plug it in turn it on and the sense of regret suddenly consumes me after it finally powers on. There set as my wallpaper is a picture of Him(ex) and Me, my screen saver? Him. My front wallpaper? His drums. I forgot about these pictures. On a less depressing note- There were tons of pictures of my friends. Of Missy,Nuey, Hiromi, Icz, Cate, even Hyun and few others. Its weird because I’m not sure what made me think of my old cell phone. I just did. I mean its no big deal really. I just found it weird. I wish I could get these pictures off of it. I think I did right after I got my new cell. But I can’t remember. And since I have a new laptop and a new external that would mean these pictures would be on my old seagate if I did. Weird. I don’t notice how every aged, these pictures are old, and everyone looks so young in them. Strange. I have only had three cell phones so far. And I got my first one my sophomore year which is the first one, and the middle one is the one that shocked me. And of course the green one is my current one. Its gonna be sad when I get a new one in another year or so. I didn’t delete any of the pictures, just turned off the cell and put it back at the bottom of my junk drawer (we all have one) were it belongs. I just made a mental note to not bother it again. For a very long time. Sigh.

Anyway, I have a Bridal shower to help plan soon. I need to start getting some ideas to contribute. Missy you can count on me. <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3

In the words of Mija,”Why can I never love anything?” She is over dramatic at times and she exaggerates. Unlike me

What I want to discuss is the book Shrimp by Rachel Cohn. I ordered it off the Borders website and I was hoping to get the cover that I clicked on but apparently that doesn’t matter. I am really annoyed by this. I thought that if I were to click on the green cover that, that would be the cover I would receive in the mail. But thats not how things work I guess. And now I have the completed series but the second one as you can see from the picture below does not match the first and second one. This bugs me so much.I know this might not seem like such a big deal. Oh but it is. And not something one would get angry over, but I am not a sane person. I have problems. Matching problems. I have this issue when it comes to things matching. Like for my books if I am reading and buying a series and the first one is paper back and a certain cover than the rest of the books in that series must be the same. Otherwise I will not purchase the book. Of course if you have read my previous entries then you are aware of the fact that I wasn’t able to find the green cover of Shrimp in any book store. They were all out of stock. But if I ever see the green cover in a store I will buy it to make the series actually complete. Again I have issues.

Today is also Fathers day and I just want to say that I am so thankful for my dad. He is truly one of a kind, and no matter how annoying he can be he is also amazing. I couldn’t ask for a better father. After church, I wanted a supreme croissant, and even though he didn’t feel like eating Jack in the Box he still went there for me and my sisters. Awww my Dad. I took a picture with him when we got home for my Dailybooth. Of course he doesn’t know that.