Inside Kimmy's Mind

I finally got my new cell last Monday and I love it. An added plus, I didn’t have to change my number. thank bob because I finally memorized it. This is sad because I’ve already had this number for 2 years. >_<

I am so so so happy that I finally have my new cell. I can now have nice ring tones and have a phone strap on it and get a pretty case for it. Which I found one by the way, it makes me smile when I see it. And ebay sellers annoy the hell out of me. -_- sigh. I’m an Ebay junkie.  Anyway, so I made my 4th vlog on Vimeo. Its tricky for me to upload my vlogs on this site because I don’t have a plus account so my videos don’t get uploaded fast. This is the only con for Vimeo on the Youtube vs. Vimeo list. Other than that is awesome.

Classes started again on Monday and so far so good. I’m excited for Painting II this semester, my class is Painting I and II combined this semester. Our first project is called the Schizo/Object/Self/Thing/Picture.

Lightly sketch in an under drawing (of a picture or object) then divide it into as many quadrants as you choose. The quadrants can be irregular, geometric or any shape you choose. Each quadrant should deal with color mixing, variations of brush strokes.

I’m thinking of sketching all the electronics I can’t live without. Laptop, Cell, camera, ipod, DS ect. My teacher said that each quadrants should be a different you or some how apart of you. A you, you wish you were. I already have an idea how I want mine to look. But that doesn’t mean that it will work out. Here’s hoping. >_< I think math will be ok, I hope. (stupid math) Gov. will be ok, and I’m hoping my online Psychology class goes well. (I must keep up with the assignments.)

I cannot believe that a whole week went by and I didn’t update. Damn. But in my defense I have like 3 drafts of entries that I started but never finished. I’m planning on saving those topics for some other time. :3 Ok off to slumber land I go. Speaking sleeping, the night I had a dream that I got an ugly ass tattoo. I’m afraid of needles therefore I wouldn’t never be able to get one IRL. It was weird. So I went to google to see what some sites had to say about tattoos in dreams. A few I found….

1. Tattoo: Tattoos may represent those things in our lives that seem only “skin deep” but may be interesting and fun. They could represent our thinking, our playful ways, and our seemingly unimportant habits. As time progresses, we may realize that our passing fads have become permanent. Thus, a tattoo may be symbolic of something that we inflict on ourselves, is permanent if not deep, and generally carries with it some negativity.
2. Tattoo – If you dream you are the one being tattooed you will become the target for a stranger’s jealousy. (0.O)
3. Tattoo: To dream that you have tattoos, represents individuality and the desire to stand out in a crowd. You want to unique and different from everybody else, particularly if you do not have any tattoos in real life. Consider also what the tattoo is. Alternatively, to dream that you have a tattoo, suggests that a waking situation is having a much longer lasting effect that you had expected.

Well that’s interesting. -_-  Ok now I’m off to slumber land.  Good night/morning.

I had my first torn decision between my tumblr blog and my main blog.

I didn’t think I would have to choose between them because I have always known which blog I would use to update depending on the event. I would update my tumblr with small tidbits and my main blog with the larger events that can make me go on forever. So I had a little dilemma, which I’m sure to you might not seem like that much of a dilemma. But I am insane so naturally this makes sense to me. But because I felt this way, I solved my own dilemma without really doing anything but updating my blog. Well as you can see I chose my main blog. Meaning this involved something more than a quick description and a photo.

Mija bought me a NDS game to call my very own. Until now I have been playing whatever games Kat had. Which reminds me I missed a BrainAge today. Damn And I was doing so well too. I was keeping up with it and because I got so distracted by my new toy I forgot about it. -_- My new game is a classic. Are you familiar with Bust-A-Move? AKA Puzzle Bobble. Well the one I played growing up was Bust-A-Move ‘99 on Nintendo 64.

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It was crazy. This was the first time I was up for Black Friday sales. We went to Walmart because of mom’s discount. And because Walmart has better prices.

Day One 11-27-09 : So we bought a mixer, a printer, and mom got us each a DS lite. I really wanted the green one. But hell I was happy. Plus the green one wasn’t on sale like the others because it was a bundle pack. And I can just buy a green case. I think I only have like two more weeks of classes. Then I’m done for the semester. I’m so ready for that.

Day Two-12-6-09:Right now I’m watching SyFy’s Alice. I love watching these types of movies. Plus hello Alice in Wonderland is one of those stories that you can never get tired of. Its been told over and over in many different ways but with similarities. I’m liking Alice so far. Can’t wait to watch it Monday night. Today is Hyun’s birthday! He is 21. So a happy birthday to the little booger.

Day Three-12-7-09: Typed out that first bit the other day. Now it is Monday. Just finished watching Alice. It was so good. I loved it. Hatter and Alice ended up together. Oops sorry gave away the ending didn’t I? My bad.

Spaced out.

Day Four-12-8-09: It is now 5:24 a.m. I kept getting distracted from finishing this entry. -_- First it was Alice then washing clothes followed by showering and then lastly what took me forever to finish…straightening my hair. It has gotten so long that it takes longer to straighten. I want to cut it short. Just above my shoulders short. I’ve had it that short before but that’s when I didn’t have bangs. I think having it short with bangs would look odd on me. Oh and how unfair is the weather right now. It is now just icky and rainy outside. So unfair. Damn I’m not going to be able to publish this entry quite yet. I’m not done. But I have to get some sleep before its light out. >_<; My poor corrupted sleeping pattern.

Remembering John Lennon.  Not many people in my generation like classic rock. So there are a number of people that have no idea who The Fab Four were/still are. I have often heard people referring to The Beatles as, “old people music.” But they will never get old for me or my sisters. Twenty-nine yrs ago today John Lennon was murdered. He was taken away for no reason at all. John was such an amazing musician. And although I didn’t know him personally many generations know him through his music. He will always be remembered.

John Lennon-Imagine

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Day Five- 12-9-09: It is 12:52 am. Holy crap. Look how long it is taking me to write out this blog entry. I kept adding to this post but instead of publishing it I just kept saving it until I finished it. Why do things keep getting in the way? lol Ok well I need to be strong this weekend and study big time for my math, web design and government finals next week. And after Wednesday next week I will be officially done for the semester. I cannot wait for January. I get my new cell phone. Gaaaaaaaaah I’m such a tech brat. Thankfully my NDS has done its job well and has kept me distracted. However, it is also a distraction from the things I need to finish. And that is not good. Like prepping for finals. -_- I hate the week of finals because it sometimes feels like there is never enough time. And I lack sleep. I really need the Christmas break to rejuvenate. (I know a 20 yr old has no right to say that) I finally learned how to make my Vimeo videos into wmv format using Adobe Premiere. Yay! I already uploaded a video this week but I didn’t know what I know now (that sounds confusing) so I must wait until next week to upload another video. But I think I’ll wait until finals are over. Good thinking right?:P

Good night/morning world.

Woo hoo! I have already posted 100 entries on my blog. This will be the 101 entry. I can’t believe I have that many entires. But for some reason it feels like I should have more. -_-

So Thanksgiving is this week. I am so ready for pumpkin pie. :9 Pumpkin pie makes me think of my friend Andrea. She was in my cce class during senior year. And one Wednesday we talked about craving pumpkin pie and popcorn. >_< Odd combination now that I think about it. If I remember correctly it was after any holiday that would require a pumpkin pie present. We were just reminiscing  aww but I miss her. After I deleted my myspace, I lost track with her.

Wow I just got my Future me email today. I think its funny because I remember typing it out and how I felt during that time. It was in April so it wasn’t too long ago. But still I have already changed so much since then.

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My cell finally kicked the can. Actually there was no kicking involved, just the loud yelling of profanity.

It happened so fast. My whole world flashed before my eyes as the screen went blank. Ok I’m being over dramatic here but I can’t believe my cell is dead. I feel so awkward without it. And to top it all off right before it broke I had just gotten a text message from my crush but I wasn’t able to reply to it. How unfair is that? I mean it just had to break at that particular moment. Is this karma? Am I being punished for wanted a new cell phone? T-T Which I can’t get until January. I can’t wait month to get a new cell. … continue reading this entry.

So I went to Oni-con this past weekend. And got to see the Jrock band Born, and the solo artist Satsuki. Their performances were the only ones I was awake for. The two other opening acts were really unnecessary.

Which sucks because Tomo from echostream is adorable and an excellent guitarist. He should be in a band with other hot talented Japanese men. Not weird Americans minus the female singer. I think she is Japanese. Anyway, I didn’t like their songs at all. So I sat to the side of the mob of people and slept. Yes slept. How does one sleep during a concert? Well since you asked. For me it was quite easy. … continue reading this entry.

For as long as I can remember I have never really taken a risk. I mean I have always been the weird kid that never ran with scissors. But if you think about it why would you run with scissors? I mean children are dumb, but would they really be running with scissors in their hands? I mean I guess it happens in kindergarten. But most children don’t really use scissors on a daily basis. They start using scissors  with the lesson on cutting along straight lines but if you really think about it…

Kimberly Focus! Back to the point,  as I got older I grew more afraid of actually living. I wouldn’t do anything that could end up with me in the emergency room. Like reckless sports. :p But I also didn’t participate in sports because I am horrible at them. I mean I have no hand eye coordination and playing softball with the boys P.E. class in the sixth grade was extremely humiliating. Especially when your junior high crush sees you as nothing more than a threat to him winning  a stupid P.E. game of softball. Its softball! And P.E. class! Not a national tournament. When it was my turn up to bat I heard him say, “Please hit the ball. Just this once hit it.” Yeah that crush didn’t last long. It was that important to him, of course I could care less and didn’t hit one ball. I guess I could have made the effort but I just didn’t feel the need to. Of course batting was much better than being in the field where you had to wear a glove. Only there wasn’t enough gloves for each team to have their own; so we would switch by leaving the gloves on the ground and you would just pick one up. And wouldn’t you know the one I just happened to pick up was for a left handed person. That didn’t do me any good seeing as I am right handed. And I was yelled at for just standing and not grabbing the correct glove. Wow what was my point again. Damn I hate when I get off subject.

Back to the main issue here. After watching the recent episode of Being Erica  it made me think of taking risks. Not huge risks but the semi ones. I mean I feel like I have always just made the safe choices. With certain situations I felt like the wet blanket that ruins the fun for everyone else. Which is why I have no social life.  I mean I’m not saying I haven’t made dumb choices. I have regrets like every other person out there. I just feel like on the not so serious decisions , I just made the safe choice so I wouldn’t have to experience yet another embarrassing moment. You know the non life threating decisions? Like getting the courage to ask someone out, or speaking up in class when I am lost? Situations like these that aren’t really earth shattering. But in all situations I make the safe choice. Thats just how I am programed. I think of nothing but the negative side of things. That isn’t exactly the  best way to view things.  I am working on it.  I mean when something embarrassing happens why can’t I just laugh at it? Its not the end of the world. I turn a shade of red and then it passes. No harm no foul right? Of course some humiliating moments stay with you long after they have passed and you try and try to forget it. But alas, to no avail. You are stuck with that moment in time where you would love to have crawled under the nearest rock and stay there permanently. But again it passes until you are to suffer yet another embarrassing moment. A vicious cycle that is known to repeat until you have trained yourself to be immune to embarrassment. Fat chance of that ever happening to me. -_-

Movies: I saw Where the Wild things are the other day. I thought it was cute. Some parts where a bit odd. But I still thought it was cute. The ending sort of bugs me but there really isn’t anything I can do about the ending of a movie. But if you are into the whole cute family movie  where the child learns an important lesson in a dream? Then you should see this movie. Plus I thought they did a good job on making the wild things look real.  I’m not sure how many stars I would give this movie. I guess four?

I have jury duty on Monday. I cannot miss anymore days of Government after Monday. I need to stop being lazy this is serious stuff man. See the choices I make? Tsk. I am such a lazy student. >_<

In my art class the next assignment is to paint two self portraits. One should be painted from life and the other can be more surreal or abstract.

I lack the skills to paint from life. I suck at drawing from life with a pencil let alone paint. And with that sort of medium you have more control over it and I am still horrible at it. How the hell am I supposed to paint from life? And I’m painting myself. I don’t like looking at myself in a mirror for very long. I’m just not sure how to start this. And I’m still not used to using acrylic paint. I don’t really like acrylic paint to begin with. I am a watercolor person. Anyway, so I need to start thinking of how to paint from life and and be happy with it. And not just keep using gesso over it. Bleh.

Moving on to clothes. I am loving putting different outfits together for class. Yay for finally dressing like a girl! I mix match different tops and bottoms to create totally different outfits. My classes are block schedule. So I am trying not to wear the same thing on the same day in the same class. I need to alternate and so I take a picture of my outfit every day before I go to class so I know what I wore on what day. Brilliant no? lol And also very vain. On top of the outfits is a nice hair style. I love trying different things with my hair. I really want to master the fish tail braid. But its more difficult than I thought it would be. And because of the Wear Pallet Blog that my sister talked about in an earlier blog entry. It made me want to pick out the colors in my outfits.

Then it started making me think of the meanings behind colors. Which again goes back to Mija’s same blog entry where she linked the Colorstrology site. Interesting things if you ask me. Next thing on my list of things to talk about is the book I’m currently reading. Sloppy Firsts by Megan McCafferty. I am loving the character Jessica Darling. Her personality is close to mine minus the fact that she is a track star. lol But the random things she thinks and says remind me of myself. And isn’t that what a good book does? You are supposed to feel a connection with the characters of a book. Otherwise you don’t feel the need to continue reading on. And this book is the first one in a five book series. So thats good that I have books to read lined up. But I never have a problem finding a book to read. But this will fill the void until November and I can get the next book of The Immortal series. And until the next book of the Sookie Stackhouse books is made into paperback.

I have web design homework to finish as well as self portraits to start and a Gov. test to take this weekend online. Pretty busy. I hope next weekend I can start that Catering job a friend offered me. Heres hoping.

So as I mentioned before. My best friend Missy has tied the knot. She is now officially someone’s wife. The lucky someone is named Derek. I didn’t get a chance to actually get to know him. But from what I’ve seen, he seems like a wonderful guy. Him and Missy fit so well together, and it’s nice to be in their company. They are the sort of couple that can immediately turn tears into laughter. Yup that is possible.

Speaking of couple friends. You know when you sometimes get annoyed by your love sick friends because all they seem to talk about is their significant other? And you feel like because you are single they should respect your tiny melodramatic feelings. That they should keep their romance levels to a minimum. Well for me I don’t really get annoyed. I feel happy when I can witness my friends face light up when they talk about their someone special. I mean if I spend time with them as a couple then of course I’d feel a tinge of enviousness. (is that the right form of envy to use?) But if it were the other way around? I would want my friend to listen to my giddy cloud nine moments as well. I mean isn’t that what friends are for? So you can gab about not only your troubles but your success as well? Most people hate being the third wheel. I mean who wouldn’t? Your friends are too busy being in love to notice you. Of course you also have to think about your friends side of things. She/he has to juggle not only their friends and family but their significant other as well. And that is not always an easy thing to do. Anyway for me, I wouldn’t want my friend to feel like they need to tone down their lovey-dovey ness in order to not shatter my feelings. I mean just because I am single right now doesn’t mean I will be single forever. It only means I am single at the moment. And why put my friends that are happily coupled in a horrible mood. I mean would you actually be able to tell your friend, “Hey stop talking about your boyfriend/girlfriend. I’m sick of hearing about them.” I guess it just depends on the couple. Because there are some couples that really just go over board. And then there are the couples that you wish would show some form of affection just so you know that they are happy.Anyway, my point is that Missy and her husband are the right kind of couple.

They moved into their new apartment this Friday. And I already feel the difference of her not being here. I mean Missy and I weren’t glue to the hip or anything. We each had our own things. But that didn’t mean I didn’t see her as my best friend. I mean she is my therapist, my wife, the cream cheese to my bagel (Maybe it was the other way around) I think you get the picture. She is my best friend. I haven’t really made tons of friends since starting college; I actually feel like I’ve lost more since starting. I mean just because she moved away doesn’t mean we have stopped being friends and I am full aware of that. I mean we have the trusty internet here to keep in contact. Email, msn, skype. (When she gets internet) And of course there is text and calls. But I always saw Missy as my must meet face to face friend. Like msn wasn’t good enough. I’d have to see her in person in order to discuss whatever pathetic problem I needed her to analyze. I truly value her company. Not once did we ever have a fight. And I thats what I love about her the most. That we respected each other and we can always see the other’s point of view. Plus we can voice our opinnion with out the other jumping to conclusions. It was extraordinary. Because most girls get offended pretty easily. But not us. Anyway, I miss her and hope moving went smoothly.

I finally watched (500) Days of Summer. I liked it. It was cute and sad. But most of all cute. I’m not giving away any spoilers for this movie because it already tells you in the trailer that its not a love story. Just a basic boy meets girl story. That doesn’t necessarily mean they will fall in love. Just saying. I love the actors in this movie my favorite scene is when Joseph Gordon-Levitt dances. So cute. It makes you wish you could find a Tom in real life.

Song: You make my dreams- Hall & Oates

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I have finally gotten a full length mirror. Now to some that might not be a big whoop. But to me this is a wonderful thing. I have been wanting a full length mirror ever since I started dressing more like a girl. Which started senior year for me. Before that I never really cared about what I wore, I made sure to straighten my and thats about it. I don’t wear any makeup. I have no idea how to apply it nor do I even bother learning how. I mean if you have to keep reapplying it throughout the day why even bother with it? Plus with my face, what you see is what you get. No mask. I mean I’m not implying that people that wear make up are fake or anything. I just mean that there are people that wear too much and once they take it off, its like they are a whole other person. Not to mention its not always good for your skin. But anyway, I finally got a full length mirror to inspect my outfits, without having to stand on my tub edge. Which is what I had to resort to before full length mirror days. … continue reading this entry.