Inside Kimmy's Mind

As I mentioned before, I’ve been spending time with my friends lately. Helps keep my mind off of things. My friends and I celebrated a belated Xmas together. Even though we haven’t spent very much time together they still know me very well. Look at some of the goodies I received. The trooper goblet!!! And the Socks!!! Gah! It’s all fantastic.

After having a bit of lunch and exchanging gifts we went around Rice Village for a bit. Stopped by Half Price, and then off to Urban Outfitters. We then made our way out of the village and stopped by Cactus music where I splurged and finally bought my favorite Tennis Vinyl – Cape Dory. Love their music! Bought it as an early Valentine’s gift to myself. After browsing through records for a while we went and had some bubble tea and then ended the night wondering around Target. We spent the entire day together, which was nice. 🙂

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2016 did not begin the way I had hoped it would. During the final days of 2015, I decided to end my relationship of two years. This decision was extremely difficult and painful for me to make, but in my heart I know it was the right thing to do. For both of us.

I’ve written this entry over and over again. Not sure how to explain it, this isn’t about what he should have done, or what I should have done differently. The reality of it is, we just no longer fit anymore and I felt as if we were going in different directions. And sadly, I couldn’t see us ever getting on the same path. I love him dearly and hope that when enough time has passed he will look back on our relationship, at all the wonderful memories we share, with fondness. Because that’s what I will see.

Now on to my promise to myself. Breakups are difficult and I’m doing my best to keep my mind positive and look forward at what’s to come. It’s been pretty difficult, and I expected that but I’m going to allow myself all the time I need in order to heal. Because he was a very important part of my life and this is going to take time. I need to learn how to make myself a priority again, and how to let go. Thankfully, my friends have made it a bit easier to keep my mind on other things. Even my coworkers have also been helpful in this area.

 My manager bought me Star Wars tights! Both R2 and Vader! I think Vader just needed some floral in his life so I paired it with this dress and I love how it looked. Just an unexpected level of awesomeness. These also made me feel a bit stronger and currently, any added strength is definitely appreciated.  Got tons of compliments on them too. 🙂 Aside from cute tights, I also have three new apps that I have been using to keep my mind from sulking for too long. Neko Atsume, Sims Free Play and Daily Curiosity.  Who doesn’t like collecting cats?! I do! So whenever I start feeling teary eyed, I just check to see if I have any new cats in my yard. I desperately want a pet cat!!! And Sims is just a great way to distract myself from the less than bright moments. Daily Curiosity is great for leaning random facts, I find it interesting. I’ve also kept myself busy by building and painting dino models. Triceratops was therapeutic, stegosaurus was a bit of a poop. But the finished product came out great, even though I think some of the ribs are in the wrong spot. >.<

 I’m just taking it one step at a time. I have things to look forward to this spring, graduation and the birth of my first niece, both in the same month! Looking forward to the little sea monkey gracing us with her presence and to beginning a new chapter of my life.  That’s all for now….

Thanks for reading

I hope your holiday was as wonderful as mine, I spent a few days at my parent’s house, now that we are all adults we usually open presents on the 24th. For some reason my mom wanted to prolong it this year.

Receiving gifts is a lot of fun, and even though the holiday isn’t supposed to revolve around such things it’s fun buying, wrapping and unwrapping gifts. My mom likes to buy us each a big gift that is then surrounded by smaller gifts. She’s adorable. I couldn’t imagine what she would give me this year but she surprised me with a new camera. I’m not a fancy photographer, but I’ve been wanting a new camera for blogging/vlogging purposes. I hope to return to vlogging a bit more, even though I no longer have Premiere, with the right camera I think I can have fun making vlogs again. First impressions: Compact body and a great zoom. It looks easy enough to use and takes pretty good quality pictures and video. It’s a Samsung WB350F, a point and shoot camera, I think it will do what I need it to do. Plus it has wifi share capabilities which is pretty neat. 🙂

This camera makes my third Samsung product and I’ve been loving Samsung a lot. My Samsung Galaxy 6s cell takes wonderful pictures and video so I’m hoping this new camera will take just as good if not better quality pictures. I’m excited to test it out and start vlogging again, just need a nice case for those vlogging outings. Never did get to that point where I could vlog openly in public, but who knows maybe I will this time. I want one of those pleather body cases that allows me to take pictures without removing the case. The quest to finding one begins!

Moving on….

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I missed yesterday’s prompt, I was just too tired and ran out of time, but I’m ready for today’s topic.  Today’s Topic is….What are you passionate about?

Where to begin? I have no idea how to answer this question,  so let’s just dive in.

• School/Career-I’m extremely passionate about succeeding in school, I may not be a straight A student, but I still put everything I am into it. I do my best, and if that’s not good enough then I try again. I am almost done and can see the light, I just can’t skip any steps but I know I will make it.  And I may not know what my career will be after I finally make it through school, but I’m not just gonna twiddle my thumbs, I won’t stop until I find it. And again….I will find it.
• Hobbies- My hobbies are extremely important to me. They represent a huge part of me and I just love that I was able to discover them in this lifetime. I never thought knitting would be something that I focused on, but it is and I’m so glad it became so much more than just something I once did/attempted. I didn’t stop when it got hard, I just kept trying and I hope to keep that attitude in other things I may tackle.

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My sister and I had the chance to go to a Youtube meet and greet for the Eat Your Kimchi Crew this past Friday. And let me just say, they were/are so freaking adorable!!!!

Kat has been watching their videos for awhile now and she introduced them to me, and before the 4 min video was over, I was already hooked. They do such cute, funny and positive videos that it’s hard not to. At first I wasn’t going to go with her, but then I thought, this does happen very often, and they give off such a great vibe that spending $30 to see them for a couple of hours was worth it. Plus, we are supporting them and their videos, so I decided to join my sister. If you haven’t heard of them, then I definitely recommend that you check them out. They have great videos, and they are so positive and just happy-go-lucky. We waited for ever to get our picture taken with them and have a chance to talk to them for a bit. Unfortunately, we were at the back so by the time it got to us, they were rushing us out of the building. Which just happened to be at my college. But we managed to get our hugs and pictures, which if you think about it, hugging complete strangers and wanting a picture with them is rather odd. But after watching their videos, both personal and entertainment ones, makes you feel as though they are your friends.

They are the cutest married couple, ever! I’m so glad to have had the chance to meet them. Living in Houston has made meeting a bunch of inspiring people possible. Thank you Houston! Thanks all for now. :3Thanks for reading and commenting.

The semester has been done for a couple of weeks now. It was rather stressful, but this isn’t one of those entries where I focus on how tough it was or even complain about the areas I fell short on. I’m just glad it’s over and now I can prepare for the next/hopefully last one. Now on to the reason behind this post!

This past weekend I was finally able to introduce the boyfriend to my parents. We celebrated Kat’s birthday, which today she is officially 22 years old! He was nervous, and I was too but after already trying 2 previous times before, I just wanted this meeting to happen. We were early, around 11:30-ish, so I took him to Hastings, a smaller version of Barnes&Noble. It was weird showing him Lake Jackson, but also wonderful at the same time. When it was time to drive to my parent’s house I started getting more nervous. My mom was at the store when we showed up but my dad greeted us at the door, he opened the door before we even knocked so  I could tell he was excited. I was worried that the bf would be too shy, but he did great. I always have fun with my family, so I knew he would too. My dad made fajitas, so yummy. It was everything I hoped it would be, I’ve imagined moments like this where I get to include the bf in family gatherings and I can’t wait to include him in more. He spent most of the time talking to my dad, I’ve also discovered that he’s not really an out door person. But in his defense, it was hot outside. The funniest moment was when dad tried to dance with Nina and me. Then Nina tells my bf to try, and he goes up to my dad to dance with him. What she actually meant was for him to dance with me. It was the most adorable thing ever, my dad even put his arms up to dance with him too. Such a perfect reaction.

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Happy Birthday to my little sister!  You’re 22! Sorry your day was ruined by the rain, but I hope you’re having fun with the weirdos.

I spent the whole day stuck in my apartment due to the flooding, but to be honest I didn’t get out of bed until 2. Thankfully I was off today, but I’m not sure how it will look tomorrow. I’m just hoping the rain takes a break so the water can go down. -.-  Going back to the awesomeness that is my sister! She spent time at our Parent’s house this past weekend where we celebrated her birthday, they also finally met my boyfriend, more on that later. Now she’s spending her third night at the weirdo’s place. It was nice having the apartment to myself when the boyfriend was here. But now that I’m alone, it’s too quiet. No sound of shouting Koreans in the background due to Kat’s obsession with dramas. Yup, I’m missing the little booger, and not because I’m hungry!- That was for Nina or Jody, because I’m sure that’s what they would have said. I still have fajitas so I’m good on the food front and after I finish up some other blog posts I’ll practice Spanish some more and probably eat again. XD

I miss you roomie! Come home safely and have fun tonight. I also hope the people of Houston are safe and that this water goes down soon. Oh and that my dad returns home safely after working another late shift.

Thanks for reading and commenting.

 

I spent time with my friend Katie on Tuesday, we talked, we cried, but mostly we laughed while remembering the amazing person that her husband was.

She confided in me the actual details of his last days. Those days belong to her and she felt comfortable enough to share them with me. I still cry a lot thinking about him and about the fact that he’s no longer here with us. And now I cry knowing more about his last moments on earth. They were horrible and painful, but I’ll keep those details to myself. I was just happy that she came to me during an incredibly difficult time and felt somewhat at ease with me. Even though  I know, no amount of crying or eating candy will make this easier for her, I just wanted to be there for her.

Ok, let’s move on to Holiday festivities, I need something less sad and more happy. I just wanted to touch base, because both he and Katie have been on mind a lot. I only got to hangout with them every now and I regret not spending more time with them. Which is why I hope to spend more time with Katie and friends in general. Life is short. As cliche as it sounds, it is. I’ve heard that saying pretty often but this is the first time it actually resonates with real meaning. I don’t want to regret things like this, things I control.

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A book I have, a friend gave,

Whose pencil, here and there,
Had notched the place that pleased him,–
At rest his fingers are.

Now, when I read, I read not,
For interrupting tears
Obliterate the etchings
Too costly for repairs. -Emily Dickinson 

I lost a dear friend this week. I was lucky enough to call him my best friend when we were kids, and lucky again to pick up our friendship where we left off. He was always so positive, no matter what life dealt him. He was diagnosed with crohn’s disease during our sophomore year in high school and still saw the world with the same rosy glow. If only there were more people like him, the world would be a better place if there were. He suffered from an abscess and was having surgery last week, only things did not go well. I still have trouble believing that he’s no longer here and it pains me even more when I think about Katie, his wife. Seeing him with her, made me believe how two people can be made for each other. And I’m so happy that he found someone that loved him the way he deserved to be loved. I only hope she knows that I’m always here for her.

 Dustin, I hope you are in a better place. I’m sorry that you didn’t get to do all the things you wanted to do in life. I’m sorry you didn’t get a chance to go back to school for your masters or become a father. I know you would have done great things. You deserved so much more, but I know if you were here now, you would just give me that same ole smile. That smile that always said, “I’m happy.”

Thank you for being my friend and good bye for now, Moon Light Knight.

 

I had this holiday weekend to finish up homework and here I am still looking at blank word documents, this is just insane. This semester has been nothing but complete and utter misery.

Tons of things are due this week and I find myself, but of course, procrastinating.

List of things that are due for the end of this ghastly semester:

• Outside story- 12-3
• CV in the voice of Arthurian character – 12-2
• Job letter in the voice of a different Arthurian character 12-2
• Job letter in my voice for the costumes of an Arthurian film 12-2
• Creative project/final essay 12-10
• Final exam 12-15
• Final essay 12-9

This is all due in the coming weeks, even though the semester is essentially over. I mean, why?!! I’m so tired and just ready to call it quits. I just do not possess the energy to type out anything more. And to top it off, my laptop is not working. T-T I am currently typing this and working on my little netbook. I only hope it can handle all the work I need it to do. I hate doing homework at school, but that might actually make me get things done. -.- Have I mentioned how exhausted I am?

It sucks that all my assignments are due and I’m still recovering from my Thanksgiving food coma. I went home for the first time in months, last time I was home was back in September and that was only for a night. My parents have been remodeling things and the house looks different. A weird feeling when you feel like a guest in your own home. I mean, it’s where my family is and I of course feel comfortable there, but this time definitely felt more like someone else’s house. I’m sure it wouldn’t take too long for me to regain my usual feelings towards it, but I only had two nights there. I also drove home for the first time by myself. I was tense and scared but I was able to do it! It was weird, in the past I usually felt this comfort knowing that I was driving to Lake Jackson because that is where my driving confidence lived. But this time, I couldn’t wait to get back to Houston to what is now familiar. Something I never thought would happen. I’ve driven more times in Houston than I have in Lake Jackson even though I grew up in Lake Jackson, it has grown and changed a lot. But aside from that, spending time with my family was wonderful, however I didn’t get much work done and now here I am struggling with homework. -.-

Ok. Back to work!!! I took a nap, so I should be able to get some things done. Pffft Thanks for always being around procrastination. Wish me luck.

Thanks for reading and commenting