Inside Kimmy's Mind

2016 did not begin the way I had hoped it would. During the final days of 2015, I decided to end my relationship of two years. This decision was extremely difficult and painful for me to make, but in my heart I know it was the right thing to do. For both of us.

I’ve written this entry over and over again. Not sure how to explain it, this isn’t about what he should have done, or what I should have done differently. The reality of it is, we just no longer fit anymore and I felt as if we were going in different directions. And sadly, I couldn’t see us ever getting on the same path. I love him dearly and hope that when enough time has passed he will look back on our relationship, at all the wonderful memories we share, with fondness. Because that’s what I will see.

Now on to my promise to myself. Breakups are difficult and I’m doing my best to keep my mind positive and look forward at what’s to come. It’s been pretty difficult, and I expected that but I’m going to allow myself all the time I need in order to heal. Because he was a very important part of my life and this is going to take time. I need to learn how to make myself a priority again, and how to let go. Thankfully, my friends have made it a bit easier to keep my mind on other things. Even my coworkers have also been helpful in this area.

 My manager bought me Star Wars tights! Both R2 and Vader! I think Vader just needed some floral in his life so I paired it with this dress and I love how it looked. Just an unexpected level of awesomeness. These also made me feel a bit stronger and currently, any added strength is definitely appreciated.  Got tons of compliments on them too. 🙂 Aside from cute tights, I also have three new apps that I have been using to keep my mind from sulking for too long. Neko Atsume, Sims Free Play and Daily Curiosity.  Who doesn’t like collecting cats?! I do! So whenever I start feeling teary eyed, I just check to see if I have any new cats in my yard. I desperately want a pet cat!!! And Sims is just a great way to distract myself from the less than bright moments. Daily Curiosity is great for leaning random facts, I find it interesting. I’ve also kept myself busy by building and painting dino models. Triceratops was therapeutic, stegosaurus was a bit of a poop. But the finished product came out great, even though I think some of the ribs are in the wrong spot. >.<

 I’m just taking it one step at a time. I have things to look forward to this spring, graduation and the birth of my first niece, both in the same month! Looking forward to the little sea monkey gracing us with her presence and to beginning a new chapter of my life.  That’s all for now….

Thanks for reading

I’m finally graduating! It’s happening! I was able to apply for graduation and come the Spring I will be done with school!!! Done! And then paying back loans and finding a full time/well paying job with benefits will be a definite must. Oh, joy.

But I’m not gonna let worrying about that ruin my holiday vacation. At the moment I’m just gonna concentrate on Christmas presents!!! After working at Paper Source for a year, I finally learned how to wrap the Paper Source way….sort of. It’s still not perfect, but compared to how I used to wrap it’s pretty magical….and pricey. Paper Source has the most beautiful paper and ribbon ever, Christmas happens only once a year so why not just go all out a bit? Plus, I had fun making the bows for my family’s gifts. My father is the best at wrapping gifts, however he never uses his wrapping skills. But he likes to critique how we wrap gifts, so this year I made it my goal to out do him with my newly acquired wrapping skills! (still perfecting them)

I got my Christmas present from the boyfriend a bit early. He surprised me with tickets to see Star Wars: The Force Awakens opening night! I thought  I’d have to wait weeks until I could see it, and even then I thought we would have to wait in line to make sure we got seats together, but the theater he chose was actually sort of empty. And not to mention, the seats were recliners and it was just one of the most amazing movie experiences ever. I sported some Leia buns and my usual death star necklace and one of my many Star Wars shirts. And I bought the bf a nice collard Star Wars shirt from Hot Topic. I’ll update again with my Star Wars review, but I want to see it again before I do. This was one of the best gifts ever and I’m so glad I got the chance to see this movie on opening night.

2015  is almost complete and as usual I can’t believe how quickly it has come and gone. I have so much to look forward to/ be thankful for.

Thanks for reading and commenting

Halloween this year was spent dancing with the boyfriend, well attempting to dance anyway. I’ve never been one for dancing, but it’s really cute to see how happy he becomes when the music starts. He seems to really enjoy it and for him to share something that he loves with me makes me happy, even if I’m not always in the best state of mind.

For me I enjoy the idea of dressing up for Halloween, but sadly I never have enough time to devote to making a full costume. My sewing skills aren’t the best but I still enjoy the process. I personally, love staying in for Halloween. Getting comfy and watching scary movies while eating candy is the best. But this year, the bf invited me to a Masquerade party, and even though he wanted to still dress up in costumes, I just wanted to dress up in a pretty dress and just have fun being elegant for the evening. I went shopping all over Houston trying to find the perfect dress. I was also hoping to use this perfect dress for a friend’s wedding that is coming up soon. Just when I was about to give up, Ii walked into this small boutique, a boutique that I wouldn’t have normally noticed. A mannequin was wearing this beautify tulle dress with pretty trees and deer sprinkled on it. You can’t tell from this photo, which hopefully next time I take more pictures, he’s not a fan of photos. I was really happy with this dress, plus it was only 5 bucks! The store was having a huge sale and thankfully this dress was a large, it’s fro China so  I was lucky that it fit me. Feeling comfortable in what I am wearing at least makes things for me a bit better when I’m not sure about a situation. I’m not the best at blending in or even with being social and when I’m uncomfortable I shut down and just keep to myself. But thankfully the bf danced with me and did his best to teach me how to Lindy Hop. Not easy. But still, fun. I just wish I had more rhythm. :/ A work in progress.

 Didn’t get much candy that night, nor did we have time to watch any scary movies, but it was a nice weekend. I managed to have both Saturday and Sunday off, so it was nice sleeping in for a change. For the next few weekends I’ll be working a lot so no sleeping in for me any time soon. After Halloween, the boyfriend and I went on this bike ride that left me super sore afterwards. I’m so out of shape, and wasn’t prepared for such a ride….even if it wasn’t as intense as some bike rides are. I totally should have stretched before riding and definitely need a new bike seat. >.< Bike riding is a lot of fun though and hope to continue pushing myself so that next time I won’t complain as much.

 Always hiding from the camera, but it’s the challenge of capturing him that makes it so worth while. That’s all for now, until next time.

Thanks for reading and commenting.

The semester has been done for a couple of weeks now. It was rather stressful, but this isn’t one of those entries where I focus on how tough it was or even complain about the areas I fell short on. I’m just glad it’s over and now I can prepare for the next/hopefully last one. Now on to the reason behind this post!

This past weekend I was finally able to introduce the boyfriend to my parents. We celebrated Kat’s birthday, which today she is officially 22 years old! He was nervous, and I was too but after already trying 2 previous times before, I just wanted this meeting to happen. We were early, around 11:30-ish, so I took him to Hastings, a smaller version of Barnes&Noble. It was weird showing him Lake Jackson, but also wonderful at the same time. When it was time to drive to my parent’s house I started getting more nervous. My mom was at the store when we showed up but my dad greeted us at the door, he opened the door before we even knocked so  I could tell he was excited. I was worried that the bf would be too shy, but he did great. I always have fun with my family, so I knew he would too. My dad made fajitas, so yummy. It was everything I hoped it would be, I’ve imagined moments like this where I get to include the bf in family gatherings and I can’t wait to include him in more. He spent most of the time talking to my dad, I’ve also discovered that he’s not really an out door person. But in his defense, it was hot outside. The funniest moment was when dad tried to dance with Nina and me. Then Nina tells my bf to try, and he goes up to my dad to dance with him. What she actually meant was for him to dance with me. It was the most adorable thing ever, my dad even put his arms up to dance with him too. Such a perfect reaction.

… continue reading this entry.

Saturday was the 4th annual Star Wars Art Fest and I finally got the chance to attend. Last year my sisters and I were manning a table at a Pop Shop event so I wasn’t able to make it to the Star Wars event. The boyfriend had a ton of events that he wanted to go to this weekend. I just wanted to go to the Star Wars one but we went to the Dragon boat race. It was too hot so we didn’t stay very long, plus getting there was annoying and we only saw one race….sort of. And I let my annoyance get the better of me. I shouldn’t let things ruin my day, but sometimes I do and then I transform into a grumpy mess. However, when it does happen I do my best to snap out of it as quickly as I can. Once we finally made it to the Star Wars Fest, and after I got over parking. We went into the studio, which is a really cool building. I should have taken more pictures, but my cell battery has been wonky so I was only able to take a few pictures. I still want to save up for a good camera so I can change that. My main goal was to stop by Yamin’s table. I’ve mentioned his work several times, here, here and here, and wanted to see all of his Star Wars items. I was on the verge of either buying an R2D2 or Death Star necklace, he has a deal at events like these, one for $20 and two for $30. So I was trying to find something for Kat, but she’s not a huge Star Wars fan. Then I was hoping the boyfriend would find something he liked, but he’s not the biggest Star Wars fan either. I mean, they enjoy the movies, but that’s as far as it goes. But then he tells me to pick one, and points to the Death Star, and he picks one out for his roommate. He always treats me with gifts, so I’m working on doing something special for him. It’s just the coolest design, I don’t remember him having these the first time I was introduced to his work, so this design must be new. But while I was admiring his work, he came up to me and noticed my  AT-AT necklace that I’ve had for a year and so charmingly says, “I made that!” While pointing to my necklace. I reply with, I know! And then he notices the bf’s keychain hanging from his belt loop and says, “I made that too! It’s one of a kind, no one else has that. You’re one lucky guy.” Again, so freaking charming. He then goes into how great the material is, surprised by the fact that my necklace was a year old. I plan to order more custom orders in the future. We walked around for a bit, saw a bunch of great Star Wars art and then finished eating sandwiches in the car. Once we finally decided to leave, I decided to take him to one of my favorite bookstores. Kaboom. He looked for a bit an bought a few books. While I waited for him, I had a long conversation with the owner. So when we were getting ready to leave, we decided to give our Star Wars tickets to her since she complimented my necklace. The event was a two day thing, and we weren’t able to go back for Sunday so I’m hoping she used them.

It was a very eventful weekend, a nice way to let out some end-of-the-semester-stress. I have only one more final left and then I’ll be done with this semester. I don’t even want to think about what I still have to figure out before the month is over. I still have a bunch of crap I need to take care of before June. -.- Ahem….anyway, must remain positive.  That’s it for now…until next time.

Thanks for reading and commenting.

You know that feeling you get when you come to the realization  that you are now an adult? I , still being in school and partially dependent  on my parents, have felt the cusp of this realization.

I am doing my best to finish school. I know that when I do finally finish I will probably  miss being in school. But the current  me is ready to be done. I want to move on/up in life. I know I won’t get there by skipping parts, and I’m not  trying to skip anything I just wish I was was  more prepared at this point.

I had a little health scare a couple weeks back and now I have to go to a GI and have samples taken, meaning needles will be involved. -.- Today I had to get blood drawn and needles and I do not get along. I exaggerated the pain a bit in my head so I’ve been dreading it for the past two weeks. It didn’t hurt at all. My arm feels a bit funny now, but I’m just glad it’s done. Now to get passed the procedure next week. T-T  More worrying.  I’ll keep you updated on the results.

Now on to happy things! I’ve picked up a few goodies in the past few weeks. >.<  I couldn’t help myself, so I wanted to share with you the things I’ve bought to distract myself and about the moments that have made me smile.

… continue reading this entry.

In my last post I was minutes from meeting the bf’s parents, and that went well. There were moments of awkward silences but I think it was a successful meeting all in all. His mother was beyond sweet, and his 6 year old sister was adorable.  She makes the same expressions as he does and it was just cute. His step dad was pretty quiet but he would chime in every once in a while.

I was also happy to witness the interaction between him and his mother. When he talks about his mom he often says how she has her life and he has his. But they joked around and she acted like a mother. Not that I didn’t think she would act like one, but he keeps his family life pretty much to himself and I try not to pry. All in all, I liked meeting his family and hopefully the next time I won’t be as nervous. And I hope the meeting with my family goes well too.

I hope you had a nice Valentine’s…even if you don’t celebrate it in the traditional sense. The bf and I just stayed in, I picked him and some Chick-Fil-A up after working an Egypt party at the museum. I even bought the roomie some pink tulips. Buying flowers was nice, I need to buy an actual vase and buy flowers every once in a while. I know they die, but they are also really pretty and I didn’t want to buy a pastry chef sweets, so I opted for some pretty flowers instead. She’s the best, so I wanted to show her some appreciation. :3

I also want to share what I got on a recent visit to Target. Oh Target, why must you be so alluring. I mentioned flowers earlier which is why I think I wanted these as badly as I did.  I noticed these beauties on sale and couldn’t help but get them. Wearing them out today gave me a little jaunt in my step, they also had some mint ones and some polka dot ones that were really adorable as well but the flower ones won out in the end. Gah! Target!

Aside from my Target adventures and a low key Valentine’s the date for the bf and my parents to meet has been decided. March 21st.  I’m excited yet nervous. I mean, I’m sure he’s nervous as well but he’s probably put it out of his mind for now. I hope it goes well, I want everyone to like everyone. Ok, I’ve rambled on enough and I have work in the morning so I should get some sleep. I’ve been exhausted and keep taking naps as soon as I get home from work or school and it has ruined my sleep schedule.  That’s all for now…

Thanks for reading and commenting.

Exes….most of us have a few here and there buried somewhere in our past that occasionally cross our minds for whatever reason. But exes should always stay in the past. This is my opinion if you don’t agree with me then that’s ok, but I’m saying for me the past should remain in the past.

I came home for the 4th of July weekend to spend it with my family, I haven’t been home in a month and I finally got a weekend off to do so. Being here has now become this portal of nostalgia and my mind tends to wander into the past. But something happened that made me dive way into the past. I blame Facebook for this occurrence, THERE that red little square that appears when you have a new message. Usually I associated it with my boyfriend, up until he joined the rest of us soul less smart phone carriers, he would contact me through Facebook messages.  But now we text/skype/call so now these messages are usually friends with whom I haven’t spoken with in awhile or something of the sort. OR….they are for people to find you without having your cell number. We make it easy for people to get in touch with us, great for certain situations but also easy for those EXES to find and booty call us so as to validate them once again. (Unless they have been blocked of course) I check my cell only to see that red square and a message from him, the first actual ex. The one who had a baby? Still find it bizarre to say let alone type out. She’s adorable of course, but I digress. The message read:

… continue reading this entry.

My sister and I have always wanted to go on a double date, but we’ve never been in relationships at the same time so we haven’t had that opportunity yet. However, we did manage to go on a double date the other day with Cloudy Chase and her sister. XD That’s right a sister double date!

It was a lot of fun! I had Melissa and her sister Michelle meet us at the science museum. I figured it would be a nice treat to show them around my work place at the museum.  I can get people in for free as long as they are with me and my majorly important work badge. :3 I finally got to see the Egypt exhibit, it was a lot bigger than I thought, and there were several mummies. Did you know their coffins were made of wood? I thought they were made of clay or something.  I didn’t take as many pictures has I had hope. But that always happens when I’m trying to make memories that doesn’t involve me looking at it from my cell screen. But I did manage to take several with my disposable camera. I’m looking forward to getting it developed. I can’t wait to see how the pictures look, I’m loving this feeling because its the same I felt when I used it back when I was a kid. I have my fuji instax that I should use, but that always has flash so I have yet to figure out how to take nice pictures with it.

… continue reading this entry.

I’ve started training at the museum this past weekend. It was a lot of fun, but was definitely exhausting. I had three parties on Saturday.  Started the morning with a dino party, then moved on to a deluxe Astro with a Star Wars theme. It was like they knew I would be training today. And ended with a butterfly party.

The first party was for a 7 year old boy, and like most little boys, he was extremely hyper. It was his birthday after all. My trainer was super nice, she answered all my questions and was just great. Dino parties will be the most tricky, because there is some information I will have to learn while giving this tour. Hopefully I can memorize some facts. The second party, the Star Wars one was really cool. It was for a 5 year old and these parents brought all their own decorations and even hired a Darth Vader impersonator. This was a deluxe party, meaning they had the big room with the round tables. The astronomy parties have a planetarium show instead of a tour. My job for this one is to make sure the guest arrive in time and then bring them back to their party room after it has finished. The third party was a butterfly one for a little 3 year old girl. This one is where I have to manage time more closely. I will have to keep an eye on how much time they spend in the bug room and how much they spend in the actual rainforest. Then I make sure to take them back to their party room at a certain time.

… continue reading this entry.